Sunday, April 26, 2015

VALOR Defined

I know an adoptive mom who calls her child a tiny hero.  She sees her daughter as a warrior and she is a warrior mom.  I really never grasped the concept or understanding of the soldier references until recently.  Her daughter has a heart special need and has been fighting for her life since the day they brought her home.  The fight I understood, but the rest of it I could not understand the reference or relate to it.  I have both grandfathers, uncles, and cousins that were in the military and friends, but my dad was never a soldier.  I thought maybe I was too far removed to understand the reference.

As we have gone through months of doctor appointments and evaluations,  I have wondered if it will ever end.  With each appointment I have learned more about my kids and how amazing they are and most importantly I have learned that they are survivors.  They have fought to survive.  I always referred to Flo as a survivor because she was so malnourished when she arrived at the orphanage.  She fought hard to live not just in that box on a cold September morning, but for 22 months she fought to be seen and heard.  She was the one up front, the one in every photo taken, if she was able to photo bomb she would.  She knew that the ones in all the pictures got to leave.  At 22 months she had skills and cuteness and used it all to be heard and seen.  I have video of her taking down two kids so she could be the center of attention while a parent was video taping for those of us waiting to travel.  I wanted to track these parents down later and apologize for my camera hog.  I am sure they knew as I knew she was fighting for a family.  Skills that she had acquired over time got her to us.
Both of my boys have different stories.  The fact that J is with us at all is amazing.  He too is an amazing survivor and each day I am reminded of how amazing he is.  And L is just as amazing.  No one could imagine what he has lived with his whole life.  I am sure as the months go by he will share with us in his own words what survival looked like for him.  He has behaviors that tell me life was hard for him.  There are wounds we have yet to see. 

A soldier is a skilled warrior.  A warrior is a fighter.  They have skills and at the end of the battle they have wounds.  These wounds leave scars.  But their wounds also bring about valor.  Valor defined as courage or bravery.  All of my kids have courage and go into every part of their being with bravery.  Sometimes I envy how brave they are and wish that I had an ounce of their courage.  On those first days in our family they show what they are truly made of and have more courage than anyone I have ever known. 

My children are my heroes and they are survivors and they are amazing! My children are valor defined!